Audi TTRS 2009 Pictures

Rally Ready

We all long to know what its like to complete a WRC stage in pole position with crowds of adoring fans cheering you on from their forest pews and even if our driving will never allow us to even qualify at least we can have a car that kicks butt.

Audi TTRS

By Danny Cobbs

Let me cut straight to the chase; any car with the letters ‘R’ and ‘S’ in its title should deliver a certain amount of excitement above and beyond its standard production un-RS siblings. Car makers have inserted the RS moniker for decades as a throwback to the days when they needed to produce a certain amount of production cars to comply, and compete, with the rules of rally sport - hence the RS. So it is universally acknowledged when you buy one of these cars you’re going to be getting something a little different. Actually, a lot different. From the race-tuned performance engine to the sports suspension and everything in-between to make it into a road-going rally-race car. They don’t come cheap either. Oh, they’re cheaper than building a new one from scratch but there is still a premium to pay as not too many of us want to travel up and down the motorway in a car which is capable of taking part in the RAC rally and takes a sadistic enjoyment in pummelling your internal organs to a pulp in the process.

For most of us saner drivers, perhaps ‘excitement’ is not quite the correct description, yet for the those masochist prepared to endure the discerning qualities of an RS-type vehicle then a whole world of adrenalin-overdose torture awaits. That is until you step into the new Audi TTRS. On paper it should be as good as the heritage it was derived from. As far back as 1980 the 200bhp Quattro broke new ground and won nearly every rally competition it was entered in. And as the years passed, Audi constantly evolved the Quattro. By 1987 it had grown into a gravel-chewing 2.2-litre 720 bhp monster. So the TTRS should be something very special. It certain has the price tag to suggest it might be. The Coupe starts at £42,985 while the convertible will cost £44,885. Alas, money won’t buy you a true representation of the Quattro of yesteryear.

Now, don’t get me wrong here, the TTRS is good, it’s just not that great. This is an Audi which seems to have been ordained with the RS moniker yet is completely in awe of what has been bestowed upon it. To begin with, it certainly looks the part. There’s the familiar TT architecture enhanced with wider wheel arches and bigger alloys. They’ve even given it R8-type air in-takes. And then you get to the rear spoiler, which, to be honest, looks like an afterthought and stuck onto the boot lid in the vain hope it might give the TTRS more credence. It doesn’t. In fact, it has little purpose other than to make you look like a cock. On the order form it is a delete option. Delete, delete, delete, and stick to the retractable spoiler found in the rest of the range. So, apart from the horrible and useless piece of plastic stuck to its arse, the TTRS looks a handsome and somewhat menacing piece of kit.

And on the turn of the key, the rumble coming from the 5-cylinder turbocharged engine keeps the illusion alive. Again, looking at its performance figures - 0-62 mph 4.6 and electronically muzzled to 155 mph - would also make you think this is going to be TT of special importance. So far so good. It is only when you start driving it at speed does the it all go array. The new short-shift 6-speed gear box is perfectly acceptable for an urban environment but this car has been designed to be ragged around and when you do, its shortcomings become all too apparent. The travel between gears are far too wishy-washy. There just isn’t any unity between transmission, Quattro all-wheel drive, and engine. They all seem to be working on different time zones to each other. If, and when, they fit it with the fabulous DSG flappy-paddle gear change, I might be writing a whole different story.

There’s another bugbear too. This car is devoid of any feeling. Given the pedigree it should become an extension of your limbs - your fingertips fingertips if you like. But it’s not. Yes, you point its nose and the rest of the car follows through, never flinching from its given line, yet the road feedback is practically non-existence. This is what it must be like for a neurosurgeon to perform a lobotomy wearing a pair a woollen mittens.

I can sort of understand what Audi have tried to do with the TTRS, and hats off to them for their gallant efforts. I have to be truthful though, and personally I think there’s more fun to be had in the front wheel drive TT 2.0T which is twenty grand cheaper. Maybe I’m just getting old...